The Curriculum

I felt inspired to write this week because of the time of the year we find ourselves, teachers, in. It is the November slump, and it seems with two CTER classes, two new preps at school, and a new house, the word slump barely touches on the feeling I have; black hole of despair more acutely spells out where I am.

Okay, that’s depressing and I hardly believe I am in that much over my head, but I will admit that this second phase of my CTER program is much harder than the first, and the reason is because I am also teaching at the same time. Over the summer I was able to focus all of my free-time, oh the copious amounts of free-time over the summer- such bliss, I was able to focus my free hours towards the CTER program, and the benefits came pouring in. I was relaxed every week as I would get my papers in by Thursday night (three whole days before the Sunday deadline) and I held back and forth discussions with many of my peers on our papers, sometimes discussing well into the wee hours of the night. These were good times. These were ignorant times. And with the leaves changing, and the air getting crisper, the change would also come to my own learning.

Over the last two months, CTER and teaching high school English, plus two Broadcast classes, have been engaged in an epic battle of rank, vying for my undivided attention at every minute of the day, even when I dream… you ever have a dream where you’re stuck in Elluminate and you aren’t raising your hand, but your hand icon keeps blinking and everyone thinks you have something to say? 90 freshman have three 50 minute discussions followed by each writing a three-page essay, work wins. I get a group project in 556, we have a project topic and outline due by Saturday, CTER wins. And so it goes. Read, write, plan, write, read, post, read, comment, and yet, I enjoy all of it.

I will wrap this up by swinging to the positive. Yesterday the battle raged on, grades were due in 24 hours at school, I had a meeting online at 6:30 with my group to discuss our final project, my other class has me writing up a hypothetical evaluation on wiki-use in the classroom, and on top of all this, I had two tickets to the Obama Rally in Grant Park. Well, last night, the Obama Rally didn’t even have to vie for my attention, I donated it (keeping with the theme of the grassroots movement). But I did have to get everything done, and I did, to the best extent that everything could get done. Yes, I was online talking to my group even as I was getting ready to walk out the door. Yes, I was grading all day on my days off, to ensure CTER would get it’s appropriate time during my nights. And yes, I made sure I wasn’t bogged down by all I had to do for CTER during the rally. And in the end, I walked away last night feeling something I hadn’t felt for the last two months… fresh.

By fresh, I mean I felt rejuvenated. I know Obama is big on Hope, his strategy practically rested on the slogan, “Just hope,” so I realize that seeing him speak might have had something to do with this idea that I will survive this trying semester. However, I also realized how invested I am in the things that matter to me, and that no matter how crazy I feel at times, these important components of my life aren’t necessarily fighting each other for top rank. Rather, they are all working together, or at least they should be. When I have grading to do, I should be getting better at it because of my time in CTER, especially now as we study evaluations and inquiry-based learning and assessment. And when I’m in school at night, I know that I reflect back on my hours in front of the classroom, privately assessing myself in my head, revamping lesson plans to better suit what I believe is essential 21st Century learning. And as I watch President Obama leave the stage of senetor and enter the halls of Commander in Chief, I need to remember that my beliefs all rest on the laurels that he holds dear, that we are to take care of each other, and we are to help make this world a better place.

I realize I have gone into the sappy, and I feel that November 4th, 2008 excuses that. As a young teacher in a flawed system living in even a more flawed system, I’ve never been more excited to deliver to the future generations what I stand for, what I’m learning, and what I believe are the essential components, not just of a 21st Century education, but as human in living in this world.